have you seen the latest alanis video? heard the song? seen her on conan?

the song is a cover of seal’s “crazy”. if you don’t remember, “crazy” was a big hit in the early 90s.

and like everything, alanis gays it up. you oughta know better, alanis.

this half-assed attempt at jump-starting your career will never work.

you had your fifteen minutes. put your one hand back in your pocket and go home.

i haven’t seen a harry potter movie i didn’t like. they’re very enjoyable, entertaining, and heartfelt, even though i don’t read the books.

this latest fourth installment, harry potter and the goblet of fire, is no different. as the characters get older, they have to deal with more mature themes. betrayal, angst, love, dragons, death, and dancing. everything a teenager must face at one point in their life. strangely, though, i didn’t see any pimples on any of their faces. maybe they have a magical zit cream.

harry is unknowingly entered into a dangerous wizard competition involving three players. luckily, they can bend the rules to accommodate harry as the fourth player in the “tri wizard competition”. in the land of make believe, anything is possible. and that’s… ok.

there is a bit of turmoil among the main three friends, harry, hermione, and ron. harry and ron get pissed at eachother, i can’t remember exactly why they were getting into arguments. i just chalked it up to hormones and mainly concentrated on hermione’s chest. then, later on, hermione got pissed at ron for not asking her to the dance and… blah, blah, blah. we get it. they are building suspense for their future relationships.

on to valdemort… ralph fiennes played him masterfully. and how did they get ralph’s nose to flatten out like that? i spent much time trying to figure out if they pasted it down, or if they folded it to the side, before putting on the prosthetic piece. and, also, could he still breathe through his nose like that? wow. i hope they explain that in the commentary. i need to know.

i still love the prisoner of azkaban the best. it’s my favorite potter movie, because of the dreary look of it and the story. but the goblet of fire ranks a close second.

Anorexia Nervosa
Hunger hurts, but starving works to you. You swarm
on your emptiness, thrive it, get high off it.
You starve yourself to rid youself of sin. You
think bones are the purest thing in the body,
and want to be the perfect angel you feel you
can be. You find youself on the scale three
times a day, writing down all of the food you
acctually intake in a calorie counter. You
don’t get to close to anyone, they might make
you let go of all you built up. You excercise
in insane amounts, and sometimes S.I. to cope
with the pains.

What’s Your Disorder?
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hardly any of that is true, and would it kill them to use spellcheck? i can eat alphabet cereal and puke better spelling than that.

although, i do feel like that picture sums up the essence of my being. female, naked, and hugging myself.

Pinkerton

Which Weezer album are you?
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i’ll buy that for a dollar. i’ve always loved pinkerton for it’s subdued brilliance. i remember listening to it and thinking, “people are going to hate this album.” for two reasons, 1. the blue album is a hard act to follow and 2. pinkerton’s not nearly as catchy. it takes a while for pinkerton to sink in. oh, and i thought, “what the hell is this cover art?”

put on yer booties, cuz it’s cold out there! gotta do some jumpin’ jacks. geez. glad i didn’t dump all my pants and long sleeve shirts. well, you can never dump pants.

no matter how hard i try, i’ll never escape the winter… in my heart.

so, here’s to you, mrs. robinson, jesus loves you more than you know.

i found this article about possible taxation of hybrid vehicles. i don’t think there are quite enough hybrids currently in use for that to generate a lot of money.

while i think everyone should pay their fair share for road upkeep, taxing a new technology would be a huge mistake. there have to be incentives for people who want to purchase those cars or nobody will ever buy them.

it’s like this: “hey, good citizen, you did the right thing by buying a fuel efficient car. you’re helping the environment and saving money. however, uncle sam is a little peeved. it seems that you are not paying enough at the pump, which is making matters difficult when we must repair all the roads that the suvs and hummers mess up. people love those big ass vehicles, and even though they buy a shitload of gas, it’s still not enough. we’re gonna have to go ahead and send you a bill for the difference. thank you so much. we applaud you.”

i’m inventing a car that runs on poop.