I find mayonnaise such an evil substance that it could only be extracted from the loins of Satan himself. Why people would eat it is beyond me. I’ve even seen what it’s made out of and it doesn’t look all that dangerous in its deconstructed form. But put all that stuff together and you have some vile slop.

I was eating a sub sandwich today when I started thinking how bland it was without any dressing on it. I told them no mayo and that’s what I got. When I looked at the menu for the sub shop, I noticed how almost everything had mayo on it. Even the Italian sub had mayo in addition to oil and vinegar. Personally, I like my Italian subs to either have just oil or possibly Italian dressing or even some sort of Balsamic Vinaigrette. When I was out having lunch with the wife a few weeks back, we went to a local sandwich place and when I asked the girl taking the order if the Italian sub had mayo on it, she asked the manager, to which he replied, “The Italian? God, no.” That was the response I was looking for and it is my favorite response so far. I just wish it would apply to every sandwich ever created. “Mayo? God, no. Who would want to eat that garbage?” If only.

We have a bit of a problem, and I don’t mean the nose candy variety. We are addicted to money. So addicted, in fact, that we grab it even when it’s not ours. We don’t care where it comes from, just that it is in our hands. I’m as guilty as everyone else. I’ve taken my fair share of bailouts from the government. I’m not proud of it. Free money is free money. But you have to understand, nothing is free in this world we live in. It may seem that it is, but it’s not. You can’t expect money to just show up on your doorstep unless you are lazy.

With things being the way they are, it seems that most people believe they are entitled to something for free. One of my co-workers was complaining about the recent billion-dollar bailouts and he said that if they divided all the money up and gave it to tax-paying citizens, we’d each receive $6000 or something to that effect. While I will agree it was money poorly spent on idiotic companies which have no right to be in business any more, it does no good to just give it to your average everyday Joseph Sixpack (he’s refined now), unless you want to create a society of people who want everything handed to them. Of course, you can hardly blame someone working at the very bottom of a successful company making barely more than minimum wage when the CEO is raking in the dough with full benefits, private jets, and bonuses up the ass. If it were an even remotely fair system, this co-worker of mine would have nothing to complain about.

I truly think that the only way to fix our broken system is to elect someone like Ron Paul, who wants to tear the system down and rebuild it. Except that, other than Ron Paul, there aren’t any people like that. Far too many people think that it ain’t broke, so don’t fix it. I would even go so far as to say that we need a fiscal conservative in office. They don’t exist! They all want to spend money when there is none. Every last one of them. It’s amazing to me that most people seem to still believe there are two parties (Repubs and Democs) and they are interested in making things better for people. No. There are people with money trying to also have power. But people want a two-sided debate so that they can identify with one of the sides and have shouting matches and get angry when the other side “attacks” them. They think their side is righteous and everyone else is insane. But I digress (again).

The real issue here is money. Or what I’m calling the Death of Money. It’s gone. Sure, we still use our paper and our plastic, but it doesn’t represent anything tangible like it did when it was all backed by gold. We live in a technological age where money is as unreal as the information cycling through a computer. Ask anyone you know how much debt they have. Then ask them if that money is real. Ask them if they care.